A Bookaholic, Pro-life, Pro-Family, Pro-Oxford Comma, Catholic (with Asperger's) who reads and writes as her obsession. I've been reading over 400 books a year lately. These are my ramblings on some of the books I read. To read about all the books I read and comment on, visit me at LibraryThing or Goodreads.

I've been blogging since 2007 and at this point (July 2015) am trying my hand at turning the theme of this blog towards mystery, thriller, and crime, fiction and nonfiction. I have some special interest topics and categories within this broad genre which include (but are not limited to) serial killers, scandi-crime, Victorian history and historicals, history of the criminally insane and asylums, psychopathology, death, funerary practices and burial, corpses, true crime and anything dealing with the real life macabre, or that portrayed in fiction.

I also read a short story a day from various collections, sometimes anthologies othertimes collections of a single author's work. These reviews are also posted here and while they are of mixed genre the mystery, thriller, horror, gothic and macabre often appear within their pages as well.

I also blog about
graphic novels and manga on a separate BLOG.

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Sunday Ramblings

One of the big problems in my life is I have a hard time getting personal about myself. I often come off as being very stuck up or aloof to people who first meet me because of this. As you'll find out later this has more to do with other things than a general character flaw. I've been thinking this over for quite a while now, and especially over Lent, and I'm going to try and be more personable on my blog here. Now I don't mean lamenting over the weather or my pets (I don't have any btw) but I mean talking about more personal topics rather than just posting book reviews day in and day out. I have many things I'd like to talk about and instead of starting another blog which will cause severe problems for me as I've already tried and failed at juggling more than one content-heavy blog, I'm going to try out chatting here on days I don't have book reviews to post. I read many of your blogs that are a mixture of books and posts about your hardships and successes and opinions that I hope you'll also find that addition here interesting rather than tedious.

So seeing as today is Sunday. Today's topic will be religious. This past Easter my husband, myself and our 8yo became Catholic and this last Friday I gave my first Reconciliation (most commonly referred to as confession). Wow, what an experience! Our teacher at RCIA class had said that the Sacrament of Reconciliation is the one that people most dread and yet it is the most beautiful one to experience and she was so right! Many people who are not Catholic have a misconception that Catholics are confessing their sins to a priest. This is not so. We confess our sins to God, just like all other Christians but the act of confessing out loud to another human being is humbling. Jesus came to us on earth to experience the fullness of being human. He knows what it feels like to be human and how hard it is to not sin and how hard it is to humble oneself and to feel that one is truly forgiven by God. Confession humbles us and adds a human component to asking forgiveness from God and a total awareness of having been forgiven.

I trembled, my voice broke and I cried a little as I confessed. Then when Father spoke to me his words were so filled with love and tenderness I cried as he told me of ways I could possibly try to work on a select few of my sins. The prayers he said over me, the absolution of my sins was a huge weight of relief that I felt gently lifting off my shoulders and I felt a joy I haven't felt for a very long time. His final prayer was so beautiful I knew that I had just experienced the most wonderful moment of my life, this and the moment that each of my children came into this world are the days I will never forget, as long as I live.

The last part of Reconciliation is to be given a penance. Father said my penance as a new Easter Catholic was to say an "Our Father" and then reflect upon this statement "God loves me so much that he gave his one and only son for me" and while I reflected on that to think of wee (my 8yo) and how much I love him and multiply that love by 10 trillion times and that is how much God loves me. I was to do this for 15 minutes and then finish with another "Our Father". Then I proceeded to the front of the church, knelt in the pews and gave my penance. A totally heart-wrenching, joy-filled 15 minutes.

I am so glad to have written this moment down. It was so beautiful for me. I'll never forget my first Reconciliation. Thanks for reading.


  1. Thank you for sharing such a personal moment. My parents returned to the Catholic church and I've always wondered about the whole confession thing. Now I know why Mom finds it so liberating. Thank you.

  2. I also find great liberation in sharing my sins and fears with others as many have gone that way before me and share their experiences.
    Thank you for sharing and reminding.

  3. What a wonderful post! I, myself, went through RCIA. My husband was Catholic, and I wasn't religious. (that is a story in and of itself. I grew up in my mother's Baptist church and I had a BIG falling out).

    To be honest, I probably joined the Church for all the wrong reasons. But a few years later, I went to a "Cursillo". It's a retreat of sorts and it's sponsored by the Catholic Church although it is ecumenical (I don't think I came close to spelling that right). It was here that I found my love for the Church. And a new priest at a different church. It changed my life.

    Sorry to hijack your comments!! Reconciliaton was the hardest thing I did during Cursillo. But it certainly made me feel wonderful when I was done!

  4. Sheila - your welcome

    Debbie - liberating, very good choice of word!

    Stephanie - share away! I love hearing others stories. Our RCIA class had several wives of Catholic husbands with a mixture of single men, one mother/daughter team and we were the only husband/wife team.

    You're so right though. The priest certainly makes the difference. Our Father Gerard is so wonderful, when occasion we have to go to another church we often can feel the difference.

  5. What a great idea! A little variety does make a blog fun, but I enjoyed your blog regardless!

  6. Thank you for sharing that. I am not a religious person myself, but I have a great respect for those who are and who can share their joy in such a non-judgmental way without preaching to everyone else.